Short-Circuiting Fear of Rejection

Most of us hate the idea of rejection, and when we face the prospect of an interview to win a project, that visceral emotion can get in the way of the confidence we want to project.

But what if we’re thinking about the whole experience wrong? What if we can short-circuit this fear just by thinking differently? In today’s post, Pete shares a perspective that might help you do just that.

Click here to learn more about how we can help your interview team replace their presentation nerves with confident presence.

Rejection Isn’t What You Think It Is

Most humans have a fear of rejection. We don’t want to step forward, be seen, or risk hearing “no.” But as a service provider, you must step out in front of prospects and ask for the job. And the key is understanding that rejection rarely means what you think it means.

Many of us interpret “no” as a personal rejection—of our personality, our values, our identity. And yes, once in a blue moon, that might be true. But in competitive service work, where all shortlisted teams are equally qualified, the decision-makers aren’t rejecting you.

They’re Running a Chemistry Test

In a selection interview, owners and decision-makers are asking themselves:

  • What’s it like to talk with this team?
  • Do we communicate easily?
  • Do they get us?
  • Can we spend months with these people without friction?

This is the heart of an interview: a chemistry experiment. They’re imagining what it will feel like to work with you day in and day out. So you want to give them the clearest possible experience of, “Yes, this will go well.”

“No” Doesn’t Mean Your Chemistry Was Bad

A rejection doesn’t automatically mean your chemistry was worse than someone else’s. It might not even be about you at all. But there’s an empowering flip side that most service providers overlook:

You Get to Run a Chemistry Test Too

Ask yourself before you ever say yes to pursuing an opportunity:

  • Do I want to work with these people?
  • Are they the personalities we thrive with?
  • Are they forward-thinking?
  • Do they appreciate the way we work?
  • Are they philosophically compatible?

This is a powerful shift. When you choose them first—before the interview happens—you walk into the room with grounded confidence. You’re not trying to earn approval; you’re confirming alignment.

Empower Yourself Before the Interview

When you pre-vet a client and decide, “Yes, this is a team we’d love to work with,” you enter the interview as a partner, not a supplicant. You can genuinely say, “We are a fantastic fit”—because you’ve already assessed it.

And that mindset doesn’t just help you avoid the sting of rejection. It makes you far more compelling in the room.

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