Present Over Perfect

Choosing Presence Over Perfection

I spend a lot of time helping people let go of the exhausting expectation that they’re supposed to be perfect. We talk endlessly about authenticity, yet so many professionals—especially in AEC shortlist interviews, high-stakes presentations, and leadership communication—still chase perfection as though it’s the goal. It’s not. What truly matters is presence. Being here, now, with the people you’re speaking to is what creates confident presence, leadership connection, and real influence. It’s not about delivering a flawless performance; it’s about showing up fully in the moment.

Presence is the only real thing you have. The past is gone, the future hasn’t arrived, and life only unfolds one moment at a time. Over the years, I’ve learned to genuinely delight in those moments: “I love this moment… oh, I love this moment… oh, I love this moment.” That curiosity and joy come from experiencing what’s happening as it happens—and it’s the foundation of strong presentation skills, executive presence coaching, and leadership confidence training.

The Trap of Living in the Past and Future

I used to be like Luke Skywalker in The Empire Strikes Back—always thinking ahead, never grounded in the moment I was actually in. I carried old baggage from past experiences while chasing future goals, and none of it produced joy. Even when the pursuits were meaningful, the joy only appeared in the moments when I dropped all that noise and landed fully in the present.

Now, living in the moment is intentional. I love life because I love the one sliver of time I can truly experience—this slice where I can feel, respond, and exist. And this is exactly what’s missing in so many AEC interviews, business development conversations, and leadership presentations. When teams walk out wondering why the audience didn’t “feel” them, the answer is almost always the same: they weren’t present. They were trying to be perfect.

Why Presence Wins in High-Stakes Communication

You’ve heard people tell a bride or groom at a wedding, “Don’t forget to enjoy it—don’t miss the moment.” The same is true in business development training, virtual presentation skills coaching, and sales pitch coaching. Trying to get everything perfect so you can remember it later doesn’t help—the past is already gone. The power lives here.

When your team steps into an interview or high-stakes pitch—especially in AEC shortlist interview training or executive presentation coaching—perfection will not win it. Presence will. I once lost a pursuit because our team worked too hard trying to be perfect. When we asked the client why the other firm won, they said, “They just came in and talked to us.” That’s presence. And that’s what people connect with in leadership, communication, and professional services presentations.

Balancing Rehearsal With Being Real

Yes, I rehearse—but not to memorize. I rehearse to understand flow, timing, and structure, just like we teach in group presentation coaching, screen presence coaching, and hybrid presentation skills training. What I don’t do is script my words. Even now, this vlog is structured, but the words I’m using are chosen in the moment. I’m looking into the camera and seeing you through it—through my heart’s eye—and trying to be right here with you.

Rehearsal builds confidence and clarity, but delivery must stay alive. That’s where authenticity lives. That’s where leadership presence coaching really sticks. And that’s where the moment becomes magnetic.

Final Thoughts on What Really Matters

So I’ll end where I began: perfection is irrelevant. Authentic you is what matters. As you think about everything that influences your outcomes—your communication, your interviews, your leadership—remember this simple truth: choose present over perfect. That single shift elevates your presence, strengthens your connection with your audience, and allows you to communicate with the kind of confidence people truly respond to.