One of the biggest things that can get in people’s way when they present is the idea that they’re not good enough. And there are two places that that idea can show up. It can either be in the minds of an audience member or in the mind of the presenter. And I want to suggest that the worst place in the world for that idea to pop up is in the mind of the presenter.
I have worked with a number of leaders over the years who have, somewhere along the line, picked up the idea that they’re not good enough. They don’t deserve to be in this position. They question their value. And as a result, whenever they present themselves, it’s like they are seeking acceptance. They sense some kind of power dynamic, and the audience has way more power than they do. And they’re always just sort of looking for acceptance, looking to be received the way that they want to be received.
Now, maybe the single most important thing for a presenter to understand is they don’t have any say at all in what’s going on in the minds of their audience. Their audience is going to think what they’re going to think. Can they influence it? Absolutely. But can they dictate it? No, of course not. And they can’t go into a presentation with the intention of trying to change what’s in the head of their audience. But the single most important thing that they need to bear in mind is they have 100% control over how they think about themselves.
Now, there’s kind of a joke version of this sort of thing where, you know, people say to themselves, “I’m good enough and I’m smart enough and dog on it, I deserve this.” And the problem with that kind of language is that just by saying it to yourself, the part of you that’s hearing it is hearing, well, gez, if you need to say that to yourself, of course, none of it’s true. So, if you are one of these leaders or presenters that tends to question themselves, tends to question whether or not you deserve this opportunity to make this presentation.
I want you to remind yourself about a couple of things. For one thing, there’s a very good reason you have been asked to make this presentation. You provide value. You have the knowhow. You have the intelligence and the expertise that this audience needs to hear. The second thing is this presentation isn’t about you. It’s about the impact that you’re going to make on your audience. And if you can be there focused on your audience, there to make a difference for the audience, there to help your audience, that’s all you need to focus on. You don’t need to prove yourself to them. You don’t need to prove yourself to yourself. You are there to make a difference for them. And the simple dynamic that I want to put into your head is that of a partner.
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